First 10 days.....Saturday (Decision and Preperation)

Saturday - Decision time, then preperation

I woke up Saturday, walked downstairs and surveyed the scene. Patio door unlocked, PC on, empty wine bottles strewn across the table and a general scene of destruction. I'd slept in my contacts, my head hurt and I felt like someone had been kicking me in the guts all night. The glass of water I drank was promptly heaved into the sink. I'm assuming the red swirly bits amongst the bile were red wine residue. My hands were shaking and when I finally managed to roll a fag I went and sat outside.

What could I remember about last night? I'd got the bus to the edge of town and met a few mates for a pint, then we headed to the centre. I remember having a "few" more beers, then someone starting bringing out the sammy's and jager bombs. After a couple of hours of this we headed to a late bar/club. I danced with some girl for a bit. I seem to remember her being pretty but she could have looked like Thora Hurd and I'd probably wouldn't have noticed. Think whisky was involved at some point, and possibly rum. After that? How did I get home? Cab? Lift? Sill got £25 in my wallet, and I started with £50. This is a bad sign. Another cash point trip? How much did I get out? Fuck knows. I assume I came back alone as only one wine glass has been used, and there is no one prone in any of the spare rooms. Shit!! Quick check reveals no comatose house guests so all good.

I made the decision there and then. This is not what I promised myself when I started drinking again. "Just a couple of pints now and then". I'd already proved I didn't need it, so how the fuck had this happened? Time to quit again.

I mentioned last time that giving up drinking is not fun, so this time I tried to get the preparation right. To give up drinking you will need;

• A stack of towels to wipe off sweat
• A large container of water to hydrate yourself. I chose a 10L barrel I that use when camping.
• Painkillers
• Some food in your guts. I opted for 3 huge bowls of ready brek
• Vitamins. After my food had settled I drank 2 cartons of orange juice
• A warm duvet, a summer duvet and a sheet. It doesn't help much but if you try to regulate your body temperature it should make the sweating less horrific. No idea if this works at all but it kept me occupied.
• Fully charged mobile phone.
• Open windows in your room of choice. Otherwise the stench can get pretty bad
• An easy to eat snack - I made a big bowl of plain popcorn, with a bit of salt
• MOST IMPORTANT! That list you wrote out that details why you are quitting. It's a bit of extra strength when you need it, and trust me you will need it.

Ok, so by this time you're feeling pretty emotional. You're scared of what's coming, but you're more scared of where you've just been. Now is the time to do some things that you would normally be too scared to do.

1. 50:50. You've already made your choice to quit, so this ones easy. If he offers to swap baxes tell the smarmy git to do one. "I'm happy with box 14, thank you Noel".
2. Phone a friend. Or three. Or as many as you need too. Be honest with them. Tell them what you're doing and why. If you feel like crying just do it. You're currently being a hell of a lot braver than most people. If they can't handle it, fuck 'em. Just remember who you could count on when the chips were down when this is over.
3. Tell the audience. In my emotional and irrational state I wandered over to my local and told the manager what was going on. I didn't want it to be a big deal next time I came in, so we had a chat. She was super cool. The fact that there is another pub down the road and a Tesco round the corner were immaterial. If you get on with them you won't get funny looks when you order a coke. They'll smile, possibly wink, and tell you "well done" every time you do it. And they're right to.

Now you wait. It may take 24 hours, it may take 48 hours. You may be lucky and have no reaction at all. It's a bit like going camping for a weekend. The forecast may be sunny but you feel more secure knowing you've packed a water proof. The first night you quit will be the hardest. Eat if you can. Read your list, phone your friends. Strap yourself in. Just remember.....

I CAN GET THROUGH THIS!!!! IT WILL PASS!!!

Next up; Sunday to Wednesday.